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Thanksgiving Is Canceled

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Because you’re killing the planet

The latest joy killing decree to be issued from the environmental overlords is that Thanksgiving is canceled because your family meal is killing the planet.

How is it that some sweet potatoes and a pumpkin pie are destroying the Earth? Well, the bastion of all that is pure and good, the aptly named HuffPost has the answer.

“Meat and meat byproducts (cheese, butter and heavy cream, for example) have a larger environmental footprint than plant-based ingredients,” complains Alexandra Emanuelli.

“According to research done by Carnegie Mellon University, the carbon footprint of a 16-pound turkey creates a total of 34.2 pounds of CO2 — the same amount produced by turkey gravy, cranberry sauce, roasted Brussels sprouts, mashed potatoes, rolled biscuits and apple pie combined.” Emanuelli further huffs.

“[P]lant-based foods consistently have been shown to have lower carbon footprints — so those walnuts, chestnuts, mushrooms, etc. are far more efficient to produce in total resources than conventional animal products, especially red meat,” the report continues.

Great… walnut and mushroom soufflé it is then. But no…wait…you can’t actually have a family Thanksgiving at all, unless you all live in a commune and never leave, because traveling is the real evil.

“Researchers at Carnegie Mellon determined that four people flying a 600-mile trip produces 10 times the emissions of the Thanksgiving meal,” the report further whines.

“Driving is less detrimental, but American cars emit close to a pound of CO2 per mile driven. Orchi Banerjee, a recent graduate of the department of Social and Decision Sciences at Carnegie Mellon, said, ‘It may help the environment if [your guests] stayed home and cooked their own meal.’”

So, also canceled are Christmas, Easter, Passover, and 4th of July.

Stay at home alone, in your pod, eating walnuts. Better yet, just eat worms.

Tucker Carlson and his guest Mark Steyn had some choice words for those who want to cancel Thanksgiving:

“‘The Huffington Post’ says you shouldn’t be taking a plane. You shall not be eating a turkey. Eating a Turkey is bad for the planet, even though it is not as bad as one of these flatulent cows that AOC wants to slaughter … instead of having a stuffed turkey, you should have some arugula stuffed with kale or kale stuffed with arugula. Makes no difference, tastes just as lousy either way,” said Steyn.

The pair then pointed out the hypocrisy of liberal jet-setters who preach to everyday Americans about their carbon footprints.

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CNN Suggests Wearing a Face Mask in Public is Racist

Because black people are treated like criminals if they do the same.

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Bruce Bennett/Getty Images

CNN has published a lengthy article suggesting that wearing face masks to guard against coronavirus is racist due to African-Americans not being able to wear them over fears they will be treated like criminals.

Yes, really.

Noting that the CDC has encouraged all Americans to wear face masks in the fight against COVID-19, Trevor Logan, an economics professor at Ohio State University, says he “will not be following this guidance.”

“We have a lot of examples of the presumed criminality of black men in general,” Logan, who presumably isn’t knowledgable about FBI crime statistics, told CNN.

“And then we have the advice to go out in public in something that … can certainly be read as being criminal or nefarious, particularly when applied to black men,” he adds, noting how a black man wearing a face mask “looks like almost every criminal sketch of any garden-variety black suspect.”

CNN Fernando Alfonso III then references how on social media “a number of people of color — activists, academics and ordinary Americans — expressed fears that homemade masks could exacerbate racial profiling and place blacks and Latinos in danger.”

In other words, the government advising Americans to wear face masks is discriminatory because blacks and hispanics who wear them may be mistaken for criminals.

Whether that is more closely related to institutional racism or the fact that black people and hispancis are overrepresented in crime statistics, I’ll leave to the reader to decide.

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‘Clapping For NHS’ Reminds Author of Communist Despotism

“It reminds me in its tendency to get longer and louder and almost more hysterical, of the applause after a speech by Nicolae Ceausescu.”

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Ian Forsyth/Getty Images
Ian Forsyth/Getty Images

British author Theodore Dalrymple says the country’s weekly activity of clapping in public for the NHS reminds him of how party members were forced to enthusiastically applaud Communist despots or face being labeled a dissident.

While no one is comparing the consequences of not clapping for the NHS to those of people who refused to clap for Stalin (that would be stupid), Dalrymple does note one important similarity between the two.

“It reminds me a little, in its tendency to get longer and louder and almost more hysterical, of the applause after a speech by Nicolae Ceausescu or other communist despot, in which everyone in the audience had to show himself as enthusiastic and the most enthusiastic applauder, and to continue applauding as long as someone else was applauding, for to be the first to stop might be taken as a sign of disloyalty and dissent from the official line,” writes Dalrymple.

Describing the clapathon as “emotionally kitsch,” the author feels there is “something unpleasant” about the implication of not joining in with the collective gesture.

“There is often the implication that if you refrain from making it—and even worse if you actively refuse to make it—you are in some sense an enemy, in this case, of the people,” writes Dalrymple. “Whatever your inner conviction, it is safest to join in. By doing so you avoid drawing attention to yourself and you are assumed to think and feel like everyone else, which is always safest.”

“As the evenings have passed, so the applause grows longer, louder and accompanied with ululations of one kind or another,” he adds.

Dalrymple is correct. Far from starting off enthusiastically and tapering down, the applause for the NHS builds to a crescendo, and on the most recent occasion even involved people playing bagpipes and others setting off fireworks.

While the hundreds of thousands of Brits who have volunteered to help the NHS should be commended (aside from those who merely did it to virtue signal on social media knowing they would never follow through), applauding from your window for 5 minutes a week is lazy, self-aggrandizing and ultimately helps nothing.

Dalrymple also notes how clapping the NHS elevates the government institution to the level of a deity and that some people subconsciously may think that worshipping it will provide relief from coronavirus fears – just like people who whipped themselves during the plague in sacrifice to God.

“During the Middle Ages, when the cause of epidemics was unknown, other than the justified wrath of God, there were long processions of self-flagellating penitents through the streets, who no doubt thought that the blood that they drew from themselves and the pain that they suffered would abate the epidemic by causing God to relent,” he writes.

Meanwhile, a similar activity has been organized for tonight where Brits are being encouraged to ‘clap for Boris’ given that their Prime Minister is now hospitalized in intensive care with persistent COVID-19 symptoms.

Given that many of the same tolerant leftists who gushed over the NHS have welcomed the prospect of Boris dying, don’t hold your breath.

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UK Cops Broadcast ‘Corona Rap’ to Make People Stay Inside

Massive cringe.

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In what some are lamenting as a perfect illustration of the state of law enforcement in the United Kingdom, a video shows a police officer performing a ‘coronavirus rap’ through a loudspeaker in an effort to make people stay inside their homes.

The full cringe is as follows;

Yo, this is Derby Police.
Don’t be afraid, we come in peace.
The government said so listen up quick.
Take our advice and you may not get sick.
Stay at home whenever you can.
Don’t go out on the streets with your fam.
Don’t walk around in two or more, or we’ll come knocking at your door.
Only go to the shop for essential things like bread, milk, fruit and cheese strings.
Go stretch your legs but only one time.
Do as we say or you might get a fine.
Please help us to fight this disease.
Lots of love from your favorite PCs.

“That’s the language people speak & understand round here,” said the individual who posted the video.

The rap is presumably part of an effort to connect with the UK’s poorer and minority demographics, some of whom aren’t very compliant when it comes to observing quarantine laws.

The fact that the rap was performed by Derbyshire Police is fitting.

That particular police force received a barrage of criticism on two separate occasions – first for using a drone to spy on and publicly shame dog walkers in remote countryside – and second for dying a blue lagoon black in order to deter people from gathering there.

“Imagining some over promoted mixed race millennial grad with an afro being asked to write a rap by police constable lesbian cunt to keep the normies locked up in their shitty terraced boxes,” said one respondent after watching the rap video.

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